Him...

He means so much to me, but I mean so little to him. I fell into a black hole. Fell for the lies, when all he was and wanted was lust. Breaking hearts is his speciality. Lying is his game. I am a puzzle piece that will be tossed away when he finds a new girl. Or has he already? Is he just keeping me around to destroy me? For once I wish he was telling the truth. Telling me what is really going on. I'm not worth the truth, I guess. What am I worth then? Am I worth anything at all? Was I worth anything, did I mean anything to him? If I give up he comes back and pulls me in. Tells me I'm ok. Then drops me on my ass when I'm better. A never ending cycle of broken hearts. I guess thats all it will ever be. I'm not good enough for him or anyone else. Did anyone really love me? Or was it all lies to cover up the plan to hurt me? Did I do anything to deserve this pain? I'm not sure anymore. I guess I'll always be broken. Broken and destroyed.

~Shadow-Kiss

                                                                                                               

Stronger

Focusing is getting harder

Breathing getting slower

Hope gettting lower

Is it me?

Am I the one to blame?

I fell for the lies

Now the pain is here

My heart broken

My head spining

You were my everything

I would have given anything

To hear you say I love you

Now I don't give a damn

You can try to shake me all you can

But I'm not going down again

I'm stronger, wiser than I was before

I don't love you anymore

Say goodbye

And close your eyes

You'll never control me again

My Deep Thoughts

What do people see when they look at me?

The girl I use to be?

Who makes people laugh and smile

Who hides her tears inside so no one will have to hear her cry

Or do they see they monster inside of me?

One who enjoys pain

And always loes the game

One who cuts to live

And lives to cut

Do they know what they have done to me?

Destroyed ever happy part of me

Made me cry myself to sleep

Ripped me to pieces and made me fall

Wanting me to stand up and be tall

So they can abuse me again and again

What happens when the cut doesn't stop bleeding?

And I run out of blood

Would they cry?

Would they miss me at all?

I guess I'll find out soon

The last thing to do is.....

Cut

Hiding

Hiding

Hiding tears

Hiding feeling

Hiding hope

What about my dreams?

Hiding pain

Hiding scars

Do they know what all I hide?

Hiding me all of me

Hiding screams

Hiding everything a person

Is made out to be

What about me?

Do they forget

And just move on

Or do they hide like

I hide

Do they cut

Like I cut

Will I ever know?

I hide